It's a damn cold night...

Forgiving is love's toughest work, and love's biggest risk. To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the prisoner was you.
いつか失ってしまうのかな。薄れてゆく笑顔と君を守りたい。
-- D-technolife

If fate is a wheel, then we are the sand that is crushed between the cogs.

Don't judge a life by one difficult season.

独自并不代表孤单,在一群人中狂笑着有时更寂寞。
-- 吴庆康

At times it may not even seem rational, but the heart has a computing ability that is far more accurate and far more precise than anything within the limits of rational thought.
-- Deepak Chopra
于是我让孤独更孤独,有一种不是悲伤的悲伤,才是刻骨铭心的悲伤。
Grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled as to console; to be understood as to understand; to be loved as to love.
-- St Francis.
People's actions are influenced by their expectations. People respond not just to what is happening now, but to what they anticipate will happen in the future.
-- Sloman
不管你会不会忘了我,我只想告诉你一个秘密。
--《不能说的·秘密》

Every action generates a force of energy that returns to us in like kind.
-- Deepak Chopra

The furthest distance in the world is not between life and death but when I stand in front of you yet you don't know that I love you.
-- Tagore
Do do not worry about tomorrow; it will have enough worries of its own. There is no need to add to the troubles each day brings.
-- Matt 6:34

まだ不器用に笑うね まだ悲しみが似合うから
キミに降る痛みを 拭ってあげたい すべて I for you
-- I For You

the optimistic pessimist

supposedly an adult, she thinks like an adult (too much, if you ask me). deep inside, she is nothing but a little girl, with her little lofty dreams and ideals. and oops, she is breaking them, one by one.
more often than not, she is just an angsty emo kid.

she is only but
a passer-by,

an onlooker,
a walking shadow.

and this girl can't stop writing.

she stalks

|| cyn bea bao zou mel ||
|| joan weepz ||
|| blockc yeanching lehia kexi zhenlin horace alvin dina sandra becca tzehee ||
|| cruzteng peifen dasmondkoh ||
|| xiaozhu xiaogui sunxiezhi ashin kangyong ||
|| derrick jinglun stefsun natho lawrencewong ||
|| feliciachin joannepeh jeanetteaw sharonaw ||
|| xiaohan hyr chimkang mingde dannyyeo ||
|| xuyunling alvinology mrbrown esther ||
|| drbondar psychdigest ||
|| kfdrawing iwrotethisforyou thingsweforget ||

After all, what is in the past but what we choose to remember? They can choose not to hide it, to take what's broken, to feel the pain and know that it will heal. They know where happiness lies, not in a cave or a country, but in love and the freedom to give and take what has been there all along.
-- The Bonesetter's Daughter

she watches on

Others desire to experience the blessedness of giving, but we often frustrate them by refusing their help.


“你有心事吗?”
“或许有一天,我会告诉你吧。”
--《不能说的·秘密》

she holds on

 Memories were also a way of looking in a mirror, but it was a jagged mirror of broken glass, one that cast imperfect reflections. Like shards, these memories drew blood.

February 2003 March 2003 April 2003 May 2003 June 2003 July 2003 September 2003 October 2003 November 2003 December 2003 January 2004 February 2004 March 2004 April 2004 May 2004 June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 January 2012 February 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 July 2012 August 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 March 2013 April 2013 May 2013 June 2013 July 2013 August 2013 September 2013 October 2013 November 2013 December 2013 January 2014 February 2014 March 2014 April 2014 May 2014 June 2014 July 2014 August 2014 September 2014 October 2014 November 2014 December 2014 January 2015 February 2015 March 2015 April 2015 May 2015 July 2015 September 2015 October 2015 November 2015 December 2015 January 2016 February 2016 March 2016 April 2016 May 2016 June 2016 August 2016 September 2016 October 2016 November 2016 December 2016 January 2017 February 2017 April 2017 May 2017 August 2017 September 2017 October 2017 November 2017 December 2017 January 2018 February 2018 April 2018 June 2018 July 2018 September 2018 October 2018 November 2018 December 2018 February 2019 April 2019 June 2019 August 2019 October 2019 December 2019 January 2020 February 2020 March 2020 April 2020 May 2020 July 2020 November 2020 February 2021 April 2021 July 2021 September 2021 November 2021 March 2022

she never gets

永远不会交的功课 || 永远不会实现的愿望

|| you ||

Responsibility means not blaming anyone or anything for your situation, including yourself... Whatever relationships you have attracted in your life at this moment are precisely the ones you need in your life at this moment. There is a hidden meaning behind all events, and this hidden meaning is serving your own evolution.
-- Deepak Chopra

she thanks

Designer : Wei Jun
Brushes : Deviantart - Spy Glass

I don't know, I don't know. Sometimes I feel like I'm a pair of eyes and ears, and I'm just trying to stay safe and make sense of what's happening. I know what to avoid, what to worry about.I'm like those kids who live with gunfire going off around them. I don't want pain. I don't want to die. I don't want to see other people around me die. But I don't have anything left inside me to figure out where I fit in or what I want. If I want anything, it's to know what's possible to want.
-- The Bonesetter's Daughter

Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.
Hebrews 11:1

Saturday, May 31, 2008
withers away @ 12:39 am

you don't believe it because it's the truth but it becomes the truth because you believe it. no one knows the truth, then just choose the one you want to believe.

It's something Mystical

Sunday, May 25, 2008
withers away @ 10:22 pm

i know i should write this before i lose the emotions to the mundane reality again.

death is scary. damn scary. super scary. freaking scary. its just damn sad. you know, if you think about life and death and you think you will change your decisions then, do it now. if one is dead, nothing else can be done.

It's something Mystical

Thursday, May 22, 2008
withers away @ 2:21 am

i nv paid too much attn to the lyrics in the past. bad mistake. only after i sang it did i realize the nice lyrics.. 受了点伤 by 阿桑

My love, 晚安
就别再为难
别管我会受伤
想开,体谅
我已经习惯
不然又能怎样

这个城市太会说谎
爱情只是昂贵的橱窗
沿路华丽灿烂陈列甜美幻想
谁当真谁就上当

竟然以为你会不一样
但凭什么你要不一样
因为寂寞太冷虚构出的温暖
没理由能撑到天亮

前进,转弯
我跌跌撞撞
在这迷宫打转
死心,失望
会比较简单
却又心有不甘

这个城市太会伪装
爱情就像霓虹灯一样
谁离开之后却把灯忘了关
让梦做得太辉煌

以为能够留你在身旁
但是谁肯留在谁身旁
一首情歌都比一个亲吻更长
这就叫做好聚好散

别说你对我感到愧疚
别说你会永远想念我
我很知道孤单这条路怎么走
请你不要安慰我

My love, 晚安
别放在心上
我只受了点伤
只是受了点伤

It's something Mystical

Wednesday, May 21, 2008
withers away @ 12:06 pm

its pretty depressing reading the papers these days. 心酸啊。

It's something Mystical

Friday, May 16, 2008
withers away @ 7:16 pm

when the five of us are together,
the usual laughter never ends.
us five being here is natural,
and commonplace.
if even just one is missing, we begin to feel like something is wrong.
if we weren't enjoying more than everyone else,
we'd feel like we were losing.
we did a lot of stupid things.
no matter how many fights we have,
or how angry we become,
if we five are together,
in the end, we'll still decide to smile.
but, this me right now,
though there is happiness inside my heart,
i can't give an honest smile.
this graduation ceremony of no depth,
is far more painful than the first time,
and bittersweet.

wad's with all these dramas abt youths and going back to those times again.. AHHHHHH its making me miss those days... i love those days; they were the foundation of my best relationships. looking back makes u cherish them more.
i still rmbr the last day of sch, so clearly etched in my mind.

It's something Mystical

withers away @ 12:12 am

suddenly alot of nice songs pop up. wheee!

only got this lyrics today.. i wouldnt say he has a fantastic voice, but its smth that's comfortable i guess. his lyrics writing and music composing skills are pretty good too.. extracts frm 虽然我愿意 by 伍家辉

再让我靠近你轻轻对你说
当我说我要你从此好好过
是真的否则我怎么肯放手

为了我就当作这次为了我
赐给我你现在幸福的笑容
别让恨冻结了我们的脸孔
请你做选择

虽然被放弃
虽然我愿意

this is the ending theme for proposal daisakusen. 明日晴れるかな。aka will it be fine tomorrow. a jdrama of missed chances. and missed second chances. heard that the ending wasn't exactly a happy one. ohwells. so, in life, always try. what happens will be for the better. always for the better. in high school, we had so much time in our hands.

shouting out for love, with hot tears streaming
just where have those glorious days disappear to?
if it's the same tomorrow, wandering on the streets
there is no turning back from now on

listening carefully to the voice of my heart
just what would i probably say to myself?
now, standing at the dirtied corner of the street
looking up in the sky, i will think to myself everytime

loneliness and the troubles bestowed upon us from God
just make us cry when we desire to
what will our fate be?
should we just give up?
it is just like the never-ending magical wonders of the seasons

oh baby. no, maybe.
is there no "emotion" without "love"?
free to grieve about it
for it is the consequence of society

oh baby. you're maybe.
there is no "joy" without "love"
the feeling of happiness
embrace it dearly one more time

for the sake of loving oneself on some days
recall on the beautiful memories that you have
for the life that has yet to unfold from the distant past
exists to make that one dream of yours come true

who will open the door to miracles?
smile, just once more
have you realized it yet?
the key (to the door) is already
on the palm of your hand

why, baby? oh, tell me.
is there no "hate" without "love"?
free to foresee or not,
in order to protect oneself?

oh, baby. you're maybe.
it is not just a little game!!
this broken feeling
overcome it one more chance

i talk to myself...

oh, baby. no, maybe.
is there no "emotion" without "love"?
free to grieve about it
what is left will only be regret

oh, baby. smile, baby.
life is not for eternity
to themselves, everyone in their heart
whisper softly

"will it be fine tomorrow...?"

beneath the distant sky

It's something Mystical

Tuesday, May 13, 2008
withers away @ 9:43 pm

what i say, i deliver. if i had no confidence, i wouldnt have said it.
you will never lose me.
just give me two minutes. two minutes. ok?

It's something Mystical

Friday, May 09, 2008
withers away @ 5:12 pm

trinity blood ending theme - broken wings

i know this will not remain forever
however it's beautiful
your eyes, hands and your warm smile
they're my treasure
it's hard to forget

i wish there was a solution
don't spend your time in confusion
i'll turn back now and spread

my broken wings
still strong enough to cross the ocean with
my broken wings
how far should i go drifting in the wind?
higher and higher in the light

my broken wings
still strong enough to cross the ocean with
my broken wings
how far should i go drifting in the wind?
across the sky
just keep on flying

空から落ちてくるのは (what came falling from the sky)
あれは雨ではなくて (was not the rain)

It's something Mystical

Sunday, May 04, 2008
withers away @ 9:54 pm

u noe it was the starting of another sian wk of mugging, and during the exam period i just pounce on opportunities to make me feel better, coz i get sensitive over evthg and i get cranky.
and there i saw it!
guess where it was? my blk kitchen!! just by the window! it actually BUILT its nest on the grills that were put outside to dry. note: they were clearly forgotten. dun u think its so cute! its so fat! fat is cute!! hahaha..
ok i noe i need to mug ok. yes i noe. ok.
因为是你

It's something Mystical

Friday, May 02, 2008
withers away @ 1:08 am

在因为猛K书变成痴呆之际,发生了不可思议的事。我做了不该是明天早上有大考的人应该做的疯狂事件。这叫濒临绝境好不?
但是,这次我真的很用心,很努力。真的。是一种我自己也难以相信的努力。

It's something Mystical